


Glitch: The Prequel

by DataSupremacy



Series: Tumblr Requests: NSFW [6]
Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: Android Hijinks, Prequel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-12
Updated: 2021-03-12
Packaged: 2021-03-20 07:20:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30001275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DataSupremacy/pseuds/DataSupremacy
Summary: The circumstances involved with Data having been infected with the virus that corrupted his modesty subroutine.
Relationships: Data & Geordi La Forge, Data (Star Trek)/Reader
Series: Tumblr Requests: NSFW [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2206905
Kudos: 10





	Glitch: The Prequel

☆☆☆

01001001 00100000 01100001 01101101 00100000 01000100 01100001 01110100 01100001

_Analysis in Progress >>>_

_Processing >>>_

_Identification complete. Closest match confirmed: **Memory Drive.**_

“Commander,” Data brushes his fingertips against the object protruding from the alien computer, turning his head five degrees east in the direction of William Riker where he was surveying the decayed remains of an unknown life-form in the captain’s seat of the vessel. “I believe that I have found something.”

“What is it?”

“This appears to me some sort of drive. Perhaps they were attempting to pull important information from their computer when they were attacked. This could be important.”

_Analyzing >>>_

_Figure approaching. Identification: **Commander William Riker of the Starship Enterprise.** >>>_

Riker places both hands on the back of Data’s chair and sighs as he stoops down, staring into the blank screen of the computer as if hoping that the information will present itself if he looks hard enough and Data stares too, the most reasonable course of action in these situations is always to emulate the behaviour of the human. However, he has nothing in his systems that offer any reasonable explanation as to what this staring will accomplish.

“I’ve never seen anything like it. Do you think it’ll work with our computer if we take it back to the Enterprise?”

_Calculating >>>_

_Chances of technological compatibility: 1.94532%_

“It is unlikely, Sir. The technology aboard this ship is unlike anything the Enterprise has ever encountered.”

“Yeah,” Geordi sighs, appearing to the left of Data and Riker, but not taking him by surprise. Data never has to analysis his surroundings to pinpoint where Geordi is; his presence is so deeply ingrained into his neural net that he is aware of his current position when they inhabit the same room at all times. Riker jumps, though, clearly not as in-tune with Geordi’s sensory output. “And even if we could, how many times have we accidentally uploaded some alien virus into our computer? We got life support systems back online, I say we try to unravel this particular mystery as far away from our computer as possible.”

_Response options: **Agree** >>> or **Disagree** >>>_

“I agree with Geordi.”

“Very well. Data, see if you can’t get these things to boot up. If they’re in as decent shape as the rest of this ship, it should be a piece of cake.”

_ALERT: No known correlation between computers and human confections. Submit inquiry._

“Commander - ?”

“I’ll explain later, Data.”

_Inquiry on hold. Set reminder to ask Commander William Riker about the correlation between computers and cake in: One hour._

_**CONFIRM**?_

Data nods his head to confirm as he beings to move his hands over the panels, attempting to stir the computer from its silent slumber, counting through the possible configurations to restore power into it as fast as his fingers can move against the keys.

_Attempt to restore computer >>> **FAILED**._

_Attempt to restore computer >>> **FAILED**._

_Attempt to restore computer. >>> **FAILED**._

_Attempt to restore computer. >>> **FAILED**._

_Attempt to -_

_**ERROR**. **ERROR**. **ERROR**. **ERROR.**_

Data cannot feel it when he is sent flying back out of his chair. He cannot feel it when he lands against the ground. He cannot feel the panicked hands of Geordi La Forge or William Riker as they rush to his side and attempt to haul him back to his feet.

**_ERROR: SYSTEM FAILURE._ **

**_ERROR: CORRUPTED FILE DETECTED._ **

**_ERROR. ERROR. ERROR._ **

***

“Data!” Geordi slams the palm of his hand against his comm badge, listening to it chirp to life. “Commander La Forge to Transporter Room Three! Emergency transport to Eng - ow!”

Like a tightly coiled spring, Data suddenly snaps back and sits up straight, turning his head to meet Geordi’s gaze. “Do not worry, Geordi. I am fine.”

“…Never mind, Transporter room three,” Geordi hits his badge again before pressing his hands against Data’s shoulders, squeezing to reassure him and then trying to help him haul him to his feet. “Are you sure you’re alright? I think you just flew back ten feet.” 

“Nine feet and 5 inches, to be precise,” Data corrects, automatically, and Geordi has to bite his inner-cheek to keep from laughing. Well, he can’t be too hurt if he can be making corrections like that. “There has been some damage to my internal systems; however, it is minimal.” 

“Minimal or not, maybe we should get you off of this ship. Clearly we’re not going to be able to get anything out of that computer. I guess we’ll just have to take the drive with us and figure out another way to crack this nut open.” 

“I agree. I’ll have Lieutenant Daniels extract the drive. Geordi, Data? You head back to the ship. Tell the Captain that I’ll be over as soon as the security team has finished doing their sweep of the lower decks and made sure that there aren’t anymore surprises waiting for us.” 

“Yes, sir.” Geordi glances at Data. “Can you stand on your own?” 

“…yes.” 

Was Geordi imagining it or was there a second of pause, there? Well, maybe he’s just shaking off the last few tremors. Who knows how much juice was in that voltage that knocked him over? 

“Commander La Forge to transporter room three. Two to beam back.” 

“Aye, sir. Standby to transport.” 

*

*

*

Geordi’s looking for Data almost before they’ve blinked back into reality, hand outstretched to grab back onto his shoulder and mouth open to invite him to follow him down to Engineering so they can do a complete diagnostic of any systems that might have been impacted by the surge… but Data’s already on the move, staggering off of the transport pad and heading for the doors. 

“Data?” 

Geordi jumps down after him, giving a little half-wave of gratitude to Miles O’Brien, who looks just as confused about Data’s equilibrium being off, and rushes out after him. 

“Data!” He has to jog to catch up with him. “Where are you going?” 

“To my quarters, Geordi.” 

“Oh. I thought we could do the diagnostic in engineering. You know, make sure that there’s nothing out of place?” 

“Later, Geordi.” Data’s walking steadily faster, his gaze straight ahead.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa! Slow down, buddy!” Geordi can’t quite get a grip on Data’s shoulder, so he grasps a handful of his shirt and damn near trips just trying to get him to stop. “What do you mean later? Data, you said one of your files is shot. Isn’t that the kind of thing that should be fixed immediately?” 

“Have you ever had sexual intercourse with my girlfriend, Geordi?” 

Georid’s eyes bug out of his head a little. “WHAT? No! Why would you even ask me that? Data, I’d never do something like that to you.” 

“Then you cannot understand,” Data shakes his head, taking a sharp left down another hall. “If you had previously engaged in physical intimacy with my lover prior to our engagements, then you would see why it is necessary for me to return to my quarters.” 

Weird is just gettin’ weirder. Geordi wishes he could take the damn visor off, just to rub at his eyes and fend off the headache he can feel creeping up. That surge must have really fried something in Data because he’s never heard him talk like this before… 

“You can’t… wait to do that until after we’ve made sure that you’re not going to fall apart at the processor?” 

“I am fine, Geordi. Perhaps a little restricted… I do not see why I must wear this?” 

“…Your uniform?” 

“Yes. I am not human. I cannot feel cold. Therefore, it is unnecessary.” 

“Uh-huh. Well, Data… I don’t think there are too many people on this ship who would be thrilled to see you walking around without your clothes on, so you might just have to adhere to that silly human tradition for a little while.” 

What the heck could have been fried in his circuits for him to be acting like this? 

“I agree. That is why I will wait until I have returned to my quarters to remove them,” Data’s just as calm as ever, talking like he hasn’t gone completely insane… and walking like he’s wasted, narrowly tripping over his own two feet. “And then I will have sex. I often do when I am in a state of undress in my quarters. My exploration of the sexual programming my father created for me has been quite illuminating. My observations have been aided by the expressiveness of my partner – for example, specific pitches at which she makes noises indicates -” 

“Data!” Geordi doesn’t need to hear that, he really doesn’t need to hear that. He can’t hear that and then ever expect to look either Data or his “partner” in the eyes again. “We should really get you to engineering.” 

“I do not want to go to Engineering, Geordi.” 

“Data, there is something wrong with you. Maybe you should reset, like you did when you caught that last virus, huh? You don’t even have to go to Engineering for that. You can do it in your quarters – but you have to do that, okay, nothing else? Cause I don’t know if you’re going to be all that well received when you’re acting like -” 

Data isn’t listening to a single word that he’s saying. He clumsily fingers the pad outside of the door to his quarters and then staggers in on unstable legs, making it about three steps in before he comes to a dead stop. 

“Hello, lover!” 

…And then he falls forward, flat on his face. Leaving Geordi to throw his hands up in the air with exasperation. 

Great. 

Just… great.


End file.
